I like to fantasize that I’ve somehow moved my current memories, experiences, etc into my past self. So starting off as a child, I can avoid or undo all of the mistakes that I’ve made thus, get lots of praise for how fucking smart I am.

I tell people one day I want to work at NASA; sometimes I’ll be a little more honest and tell people I want to be an astronaut. But part of me is very convinced that my destiny is to be a leader in a space colony, whether on Mars, the moon, or just in space.

I have this constant mental desire to be boiled alive. I don’t logically want it, but I still emotionally want it more than anything.

When I was a kid, once we threw small rocks towards a passenger train. A few days later I heard in the news that a little girl was killed by a small rock flying through the window of the cabin. I got too nervous to verify the details, but still, I may or may not be the killer of a little girl.

I sometimes fantasize about winning the lottery, and helping people I know get the things they need the most, and doing it so only the friends we help and our family (not all the family, either) know we won, because we keep living in our house, and driving modest cars.

Ramming the next motherfucker who casually pulls out in front of me, after looking. Ram them off the road. Terrify them.

I want to live in the middle of the woods in a cabin that I built myself with colorful plastering, surrounded by gardens and chickens and goats.

I’ve always wanted to catch something really expensive and fragile like a vase or a camera, or precious like a woman, at the last second as it falls to the ground. Or possibly both at the same time, Spider-Man style. I’ve been developing my catlike reflexes but the problem is no one ever seems to drop things.

A lot of the time I when someone is talking to me I think about punching them in the face. This is for no reason, just a wonder what would happen kind of thing. Could be a boss, a friend, someone I don’t know.

I wish I had an unlimited budget for food. I’m quite well off, but just the prospect of NEVER having to think about price, not even for the most expensive meal in the world or giant feast for all my friends makes my stomach turn knots in pure happiness.